22 Jump Street scene: ROTG and Frozen style
by Lois117
Summary: Ok, so if any of you guys have seen 22 Jump Street, then you'll remember that these scenes are some of the funniest scenes. This story started out as just one scene, but I decided to add a few more. These scenes are reenacted by characters from Frozen and Rise of the Guardians. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**Ok, so this idea came to me in a dream, and I thought that maybe this could be a Christmas present to everyone out there. This is my favorite scene from 22 Jump Street. I own nothing.**

**Cast**

**Channing Tatum (Jenko): Jack Frost**

**Jonah Hill (Schmidt): Kristoff**

**Ice Cube (Chief): Easter Bunny/Bunnymund**

**Extras: People from Disney, Pixar, and DreamWorks**

**Setting: Inside 22 Jump Street headquarters.**

* * *

><p>Kristoff and Jack Frost were inside the chief's office, but the chief looks really pissed off, mostly at Kristoff. Jack would begin to say, "Captain, we have something really really important to tell you about-" Jack would see Kristoff strapping himself into a bullet proof vest. He asks, "Are you wearing Kevlar?"<p>

Chief Bunnymund would start to speak, "Now gentleman, we're not going to sit here" slams down his gun, "and pretend that there's not a big ass elephant in the room"

Jack would ask Bunny, "What the fuck is going on?"

Bunnymund, furious, would slam down a picture of Anna, "This what the fuck is going on."

It took a few seconds for Jack to process the picture and Bunny looking at Kristoff. Jack finally figured out what was going on, "Oh shit! Oh shit!" and he starts to hysterically laugh at Kristoff, "Oh shit! No! That is not happening right now! No!" Jack would go down and tell everyone, "Ay yall! He's fucking the captain's daughter! Yo!"

As Jack is shouting and telling everyone that Kristoff fucked Anna, Bunnymund would threaten Kristoff by saying, "Every time he says that shit, that's another foot in your ass."

Jack would say to Kristoff from the window, "Kristoff, you clearly… Yo! This is the best thing ever." Jack would keep laughing and saying, "Kristoff fucked the captain's daughter!" and he starts to sing, "Kristoff fucked the captain's daughter! Kristoff fucked the captain's daughter!" Jack would come back into the office, "Shit! Fuck! You fucked Captain Bunntmund's daughter?! Captain, What the fuck?! You bragged to him to his face! To his actual face! Captain… You understand that this face, right here, you bragged to that face? You actually high fived Kristoff for fucking your daughter. Holy shit! Oh my god, this is…" Bunny faces the gun at Jack, and Jack starts to calm down, "It's really not that funny."

Kristoff would finally speak, "I just want to say that it was bizarre not to share the fact that your daughter went to MC State."

Bunnymund would also say, "I think it's bizarre that I haven't cut your mother fuckin' nuts off."

Jack would share a solution, "What if captain gets to punch you in the face one time? Really, really, really hard."

"Nah. I got something way better than that." Says Bunnymund as everyone would gather around Kristoff and Bunnymund. Bunny would use a Taser gun on Kristoff's private area, shocking him as everyone would wince at his pain. Kristoff falls over as Jack catches him.

* * *

><p><strong>So that is, by far, my favorite part of the whole movie. It was kind of hard to write this because I was laughing the whole time. Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all.<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**Ok, someone told me to do another one of these stories, but with the part when Jenko tries to speak Spanish. So here it is, I own nothing.**

**Jenko (Channing Tatum) - Jack Frost**

**Schmidt (Jonah Hill) – Kristoff**

**Mexican Trafficker (Sleepy) – Hans**

**English Trafficker (Ghost) – Pitch Black**

Kristoff and Jack Frost are watching a college professor on their IPad teaching a course, "Yin is characterized as slow, soft, passive, and is associated with water and femininity while Yang by contrast is fast, solid…"

Kristoff is a little pissed, "Man, this is bs. I thought we were going to actual college, not online college. Listening for coded messages in lectures."

Jack Frost looks at him, "What are you talking about? Look around, this is our city. What do we want to be in college for?"

"You're right, partners for life." Says Kristoff as they both fist bump.

They continue listening in on the video, "In Metro City Port, the tide comes in at 10:30 a.m. then it will return to the sea."

"Metro Port, it's time." Says Jack Frost as they get the guns from the back of the car.

"Let's do this." Says Kristoff as they ready their weapons and practice their poses and do some sort of dance. "Surprise," Says Kristoff as Jack comes out from behind, "there's two more arms." Then they start to strut with their car driving itself. They start to pull up to the hide out, until Kristoff notices someone, "Shit! That's the Ghost."

"The Ghost?" Asks Jack.

"Nillsen Joste, biggest trafficker of illegal goods in Metro City. He teamed up with the Mexican cartel and running all this shit to the port. What the hell are we supposed to be buying?" explains Kristoff.

"I don't know." Jack sees Kristoff unbuttoning his flannel sweater, "What are you doing?"

"Huh? I got a new identity, it's gonna be killer and I'm gonna be filling it to you to make it legit."

Jack sighs in annoyance, "Ok."

"I'm gonna need you to improvise, ok?"

"I don't want to improvise."

"I'm gonna need you to improvise."

"I suck at improvising, I don't wanna do it."

"Ok, I'm gonna need absolute silence while I fall into character." Says Kristoff as he closes his eyes and tries to get into character, but Jack Frost is just frustrated, "I'm gonna need absolute silence while I fall into character."

Jack Frost asks, "Can you give me like a head start…"

"I need absolute silence."

"Please, can you…"

"Absolute silence." Once Kristoff finally gets into character, they get out of the car with Kristoff looking like some sort of cholo. They start to walk up to the drug dealers.

"Are you fucking serious right now?" Asks Jack who is frustrated.

Pitch says to his workers, "Alright, I hate people who are late."

Kristoff starts to talk Spanish, "Hora le vato." He starts to talk in his fake Spanish accent, "We trying to see that product. Shit! Yo Sleepy, what's up, homie? You know my cousin? Sad boy."

"Think you got the wrong guy homes." Says Hans as he shows them his gun.

"Its bull shit, man, dude, you Sleepy. Everyone said in the barrio 'Sleepy, he like the Mexican Wolverine and shit. Ey, my partner here want to see the product."

Hans asks, "Why ain't he talking?"

Jack says, in a horrible fake Spanish accent, "My name is Jeff."

"That's Jeff, man." Says Kristoff, "Tell them feast of cuince years of mousie, man. How about that crazy adventure you guys had?"

Jack, still in his Spanish accent would say, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Aw man, when you were telling the story last night. You had so much detail! The detail was so rich, it was rich detail! Going into incredibly descriptive detail of the story so we all know."

"Oh yes, it was Dore and Diego and Swiper."

"Swiper?" Asks Hans.

Kristoff starts to ask, "Ey, who was that you choked out? Oh, he had it coming, who was that?"

"Boots."

"No man, that wasn't Boots! Boots isn't a real name! You gotta tell them the real story, man." Pitch starts to approach them as Kristoff tells them, "Start over from the top, that's a made up name."

Pitch finally approaches them and says, "Can't believe the punks I have to deal with these days." He starts to take out his switch blade knife, "Really makes me miss the 90s." He puts the knife up to Kristoff's neck, "When we had professionals around." He takes the knife off of Kristoff's neck and turns it to the hand, "You wanna check out the goods?" He hands the knife to Kristoff, "Check it out." He takes the knife from Pitch, "And shut up, alright?"

Jack and Kristoff start to walk through the crowd, "Where'd you find this gringo, man? The fuckin Mumford & Sons concert and shit?" Says Kristoff as he chuckles.

**Alright, here you go for the people who love this scene, let me know in the reviews if you like it.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Ok, this is definitely the last one I'm going to post for this story, this scene is where Jenko and Schmidt are tripping when they accidently take the drugs, and to do so, I snuck in some of that drug into their foods. They're here right now, how do you guys feel?**

**Kristoff: I feel so focused right now.**

**Jack Frost: Yeah, like I can solve a long math problem while bringing a snow blizzard.**

**Kristoff: And I can like cut ice with just a karate chop or just punch the ice to make even more ice.**

**Jack Frost: Dude! That would be awesome!**

**Lois117: Luckily, they are going to be tripping balls soon, so enjoy! I own nothing.**

**Jenko (Channing Tatum) – Jack Frost**

**Schmidt (Jonah Hill) – Kristoff**

Jack Frost and Kristoff were running back to university after their stake out.

"Do you think he saw us?" asks Kristoff.

"No, you're just paranoid cause' we're about to trip balls." Says Jack Frost.

"No, I'm paranoid because it could be dangerous."

"No, we are well. Look, we got it." Jack and Kristoff finally made it to the door, "We did it. It's all good."

They were about to go in until their heads got covered with black bags, "Shit!" says Kristoff as they were being taken away, hands being tied, and then shoved into the trunk of a car. They kept shouting and asking what was going on as they were being taken away. Kristoff starts to freak out, "I can't breathe. They made us! They're gonna kill us!" Kristoff starts to feel Jenko going away, "Jenko! Where are you going?" Kristoff removes his bag and frees his hands, then he starts to realize that he's tripping, "I think we're tripping." Kristoff sees that his trip looks like hell, literally, "Oh fuck! I'm having a bad trip! We're having a bad trip!"

Jack's side was all happy and fun on the beach, "I think we are tripping, but… God, isn't this great?"

"My side is so much scarier than yours."

"Oh shit, your trip sucks. You should come over here, its way better."

"Ok." Kristoff would start to walk to other side, but an invisible wall blocks his side from Jack's side, "It's some kind of weird split screen."

Jack gets tickled by a giant football, "H-Hello football."

Kristoff starts to call him, "Jack! Jack!"

Jack starts to ride a toy Lamborghini, "I finally got my lambo! Hey, Kristoff, look! Look! Look!"

A storm starts to come in Kristoff's side while Jack Frost starts to dance to "Ass and Titties." Soon sad emo music starts to play on Kristoff's side, "My legs are tired." Three Jack Frosts start to dance with Korean Jesus as Kristoff covers his ears and shouts, "Help! No more music!" Kristoff starts to hear a voice "You'll always be alone." Then he starts to see weird images, "Hey, Jack."

"What?" Asks Jack then he starts to float up.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm just gonna go up for a while, ok."

"Stay, stay here."

"No, I don't wanna stay here, I'm flying this is amazing."

Kristoff starts to run to Jack, "No. God. No, don't go!"

"Oh, my god."

Kristoff starts tugging on Jack's arm, "No! Stay here!"

Jack feels his arm being tugged, "No, no, stop it! You're dragging me down! Why would you drag me down?"

"Please, stay!"

"I'm flying."

"Stay!"

Kristoff finally gets Jack Frost down, but he breaks his trip making it look like the Yin Yang sign.

**Alright, looks like these guys are finally tripping balls, how do I know that? Well, Kristoff is hugging a sack of potatoes and rocking back and forth while Jack Frost is just staring at the TV watching **_**Dora the Explorer**_**.**

**Jack Frost: Dora is so smart! (Starts clapping)**

**Kristoff: It's just me and you, Anna. Us against the world!**

**Lois117: Kristoff, you're just hugging a sack of potatoes!**

**Kristoff: She may be a potato to you, but she's everything to me!**

**Lois117: Ok, so I'll see you next time, and please review what you think. Bye!**


End file.
